(no subject)
16/10/11 07:58![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
greghousesgfIn The Year 2025
(no apology to Zager and Evans; it's a crummy song)
The doorbell rang and an old man in a wheelchair answered it, seeing a slender teenage girl with long straight brown hair and a quirky expression.
"Hi, Greg, Uncle James isn't home, is he?"
"Well, of course not, if he were home he wouldn't make his poor old crippled boyfriend answer the door now would he?" The tone of his voice and the mischievous twinkle in his large blue eyes made it clear he was in a much better mood than his words indicated.
"You just got home from the hospital! How's the cyber-prosthetic doing?"
"Not bad, actually, Foreman says I should be walking and not feeling any pain at all in a few days, don't know if I can do the hoochie coo, though. In the meantime, your uncle's at the grocery store picking me up some painkillers."
"By 'painkillers', you don't mean whiskey, now, right?"
"Nooooo, just a harmless pack of med joints. You know that was illegal when you were a baby?"
"No way, really?"
"What are you doing here?"
"Um, I, uh, just wanted to visit."
"Jennifer Wilson, you know I'm the one person you can't bullshit. You had another fight with your parents, didn't you?"
She sighed and tossed her head. "I am so sick of hearing about what a disappointment I am and why can't I be more like Queen Kathy, the perfect daughter! Shit! Can I crash here tonight?"
"I don't know why not." He backed the wheelchair away from the door a bit so she could come in. "Your uncle is getting popcorn too so we can have movie night."
"Ooo, phasing! What are you watching?"
"Willy Wonka--"
"Gene Wilder, Johnny Depp or Eddie Izzard?"
"Gene Wilder, although the Eddie Wonka has better songs. That damn Oompa Loompa song from the Wilder one gets on my last nerve. Also Eraserhead--"
"Jack Nance or Shia LeBeouf?"
"Please. Like I'd let that shitty remake into the house. Also, Chi's in the kitchen, she brought me a devil's food cake."
"Hi, Chi!"
"Hi, Jennifer! Come on in here, let me cut you a piece of cake and get you something to drink. We have coffee--"
House raised an eyebrow. "Your parents don't like you drinking coffee--"
Jennifer rolled her eyes.
"--but they're not here now, are they?"
Much later that night, after Chi had gone home and Jennifer had fallen asleep on the couch, House and Wilson were getting ready to go to bed.
"I think you've mellowed with age, and being in less pain probably has something to do with it too, House. I remember when you didn't want to socialize with anybody but me."
"Oh, give me a break."
"You know, you shouldn't spoil Jennifer so much by letting her eat that much cake. You had these grapes in our bedroom the whole time. We're doctors, we should be encouraging her to eat more healthy snacks."
"Chi and Jennifer shouldn't eat those grapes. It's OK for you to be eating them, though, Wilson." House grinned evilly.
Wilson looked alarmed through a mouthful of grapes. "What'd you do to them?!"
"I was absolutely so bored before Chi and Jennifer came over that I decided to see how many of them I could fit under my foreskin before it got uncomfortable. Oh, quit gagging, you suck my dick all the time."
(no apology to Zager and Evans; it's a crummy song)
The doorbell rang and an old man in a wheelchair answered it, seeing a slender teenage girl with long straight brown hair and a quirky expression.
"Hi, Greg, Uncle James isn't home, is he?"
"Well, of course not, if he were home he wouldn't make his poor old crippled boyfriend answer the door now would he?" The tone of his voice and the mischievous twinkle in his large blue eyes made it clear he was in a much better mood than his words indicated.
"You just got home from the hospital! How's the cyber-prosthetic doing?"
"Not bad, actually, Foreman says I should be walking and not feeling any pain at all in a few days, don't know if I can do the hoochie coo, though. In the meantime, your uncle's at the grocery store picking me up some painkillers."
"By 'painkillers', you don't mean whiskey, now, right?"
"Nooooo, just a harmless pack of med joints. You know that was illegal when you were a baby?"
"No way, really?"
"What are you doing here?"
"Um, I, uh, just wanted to visit."
"Jennifer Wilson, you know I'm the one person you can't bullshit. You had another fight with your parents, didn't you?"
She sighed and tossed her head. "I am so sick of hearing about what a disappointment I am and why can't I be more like Queen Kathy, the perfect daughter! Shit! Can I crash here tonight?"
"I don't know why not." He backed the wheelchair away from the door a bit so she could come in. "Your uncle is getting popcorn too so we can have movie night."
"Ooo, phasing! What are you watching?"
"Willy Wonka--"
"Gene Wilder, Johnny Depp or Eddie Izzard?"
"Gene Wilder, although the Eddie Wonka has better songs. That damn Oompa Loompa song from the Wilder one gets on my last nerve. Also Eraserhead--"
"Jack Nance or Shia LeBeouf?"
"Please. Like I'd let that shitty remake into the house. Also, Chi's in the kitchen, she brought me a devil's food cake."
"Hi, Chi!"
"Hi, Jennifer! Come on in here, let me cut you a piece of cake and get you something to drink. We have coffee--"
House raised an eyebrow. "Your parents don't like you drinking coffee--"
Jennifer rolled her eyes.
"--but they're not here now, are they?"
Much later that night, after Chi had gone home and Jennifer had fallen asleep on the couch, House and Wilson were getting ready to go to bed.
"I think you've mellowed with age, and being in less pain probably has something to do with it too, House. I remember when you didn't want to socialize with anybody but me."
"Oh, give me a break."
"You know, you shouldn't spoil Jennifer so much by letting her eat that much cake. You had these grapes in our bedroom the whole time. We're doctors, we should be encouraging her to eat more healthy snacks."
"Chi and Jennifer shouldn't eat those grapes. It's OK for you to be eating them, though, Wilson." House grinned evilly.
Wilson looked alarmed through a mouthful of grapes. "What'd you do to them?!"
"I was absolutely so bored before Chi and Jennifer came over that I decided to see how many of them I could fit under my foreskin before it got uncomfortable. Oh, quit gagging, you suck my dick all the time."
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(no subject)
16/10/11 15:49 (UTC)The only statement I seriously object to is that House, or Hugh, will be old in 2025. I think old age starts around 75. At 66 Hugh will be an incredibly handsome, mature gentleman, just like he is now :).
On a different note, I am not optimistic on your country making pot legal in 2025. Italy has better chances, since I expect there will beEuropean pressure (and personal use is legal throughout Europe anyway I think).
(no subject)
16/10/11 16:54 (UTC)i actually saw a guy do the grapes under the foreskin deal in an anti-circumcision lecture i went to earlier this month. he had on a white doctor's coat and kept cracking jokes, it was like he was House and Wilson rolled into one.
of course House/Hugh is and will be an incredibly handsome, mature gentleman, but i was trying to imply that at this point in his life House thinks of himself as an old man.
I'm not too optimistic myself about the weed issue, but then again I didn't think the Berlin wall would come down in 1989 or that we would have an African-American president in 2008.
(no subject)
16/10/11 17:40 (UTC)you saw the grapes go there? Wow. The lectures you go to seem so much more interesting than the ones I attend.
(no subject)
16/10/11 19:00 (UTC)(no subject)
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16/10/11 16:43 (UTC)(no subject)
16/10/11 23:26 (UTC)(no subject)
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17/10/11 15:40 (UTC)(no subject)
18/10/11 04:57 (UTC)Dialogue is pretty tight, all told.
(no subject)
18/10/11 15:16 (UTC)