Nov. 22nd, 2008

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Jeeves and the Very Happy Ending


"Jeeves, what on Earth is a police telephone box doing in the alley behind the Drones club?! Did Figgy Featherstonehaugh decide to go beyond the usual pinching policemen's helmets?"
"Sir, while you are correct in surmising that the object in question was absconded with by some of your fellow Drones in high spirits, the rightful owner of this particular object is not the police but a gentleman calling himself 'the Doctor'." (discreet cough) "This rather complicates the situation, sir."
"Can't just bung the bally thing back to the police, then?"
"Sir, I have taken the liberty of examining and testing the device and, as unlikely as this sounds, it appears to be a fully functional time travel vehicle."
"I say!"
"I should like to propose that we avail ourselves of the opportunity to escape to an era in which the true nature of our, shall we say, relationship can be acknowledged quite openly."
"Now, now, Jeeves, I may not be over-burdened in the brains department, but even I know one can't jolly well go about shouting from the rooftops about what an absolutely bally marvelous lover one's valet is, as much as I enjoy the idea! It simply isn't on."
"Sir, although discretion is very much called for in these matters now, I have seen a future era that is very much changed in its nature. For example, in the time period which I visited, the United States had just elected a gentleman of African descent to the Presidency."
"Good Lord! Things have changed, haven't they?"
"In many ways, very much for the better, sir. I shall, of course, engage the homing device so the conveyance returns to the Doctor after we have reached our destination."
"Well, Jeeves, the future awaits! Shall we?"
"Very good, sir. I have done a good deal of research and I believe the results will be the most sanguine if we choose to make our residence in an area of San Francisco, California colorfully known as the Castro."
"And you're quite sure the assets outweigh the erm, thingummies?"
"Liabilities? Yes, sir, the only inconvenience to yourself is the possibility that you may be occasionally mistaken for an ill-tempered diagnostician."
"Is this the same Doctor chappie who owns the whatsit?"
"No, sir. I shall explain later."

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